Love is Not What Nearly All People Believe

Is this man off his trolley?

I am one whose 'path' in this lifetime, if it is to include any close relationships at all, looks like involving the forming of close, loving relationships with one or more other MEN - shock horror! This must look a bit alien to those who would expect the sort of information here which they would find in, say, religious scriptures or ancient historical documents. For a person who many would regard as some sort of enlightened spiritual teacher, surely I would have little or no need for physical loving relationships at all - and in any case would not indulge in the iniquity and depravity of homosexuality of all disgusting things! Surely that Philip Goddard fellow is a corrupt and depraved individual, or plain sick, regarding men rather than women as potential lovers, and he should have been struck down by God...

...Well, at least it's true that I have no need for close physical relationships with other people - but that is not the same thing at all as saying that I shouldn't have such relationships, nor that such relationships, carefully and awarely chosen, wouldn't benefit me. But then again, isn't it about time that we got more directly and honestly into self scrutiny concerning this matter of what we call 'relationships'?

As I shall explain below, with regard to the nature of love and the significance of 'relationships' in our lives, people are almost universally being deceived over these and thus led seriously astray from where they really need to be. That deception and leading astray comes to us through a huge multitude of intermediate routes but from one common original source. And that source is something 'not very nice', which most people would rather believe doesn't exist - which latter point is a big part of the problem...

But what is love anyway?

You thought you knew, huh? -- Indeed almost universally people believe they know what love is, and yet, as one with the viewpoint of enlightenment and a fairly advanced state of self realization and clearance of astral influences, I can see that virtually none of them really know what it is and are calling all sorts of things 'love' which are actually pointing diametrically away from it, and about which people would be horrified if they came to really understand the origin and true purpose of what they have been calling 'love'.

Okay, so it's my unedifying task now to perhaps unsettle or even horrify or anger you just a little - but let me say now that my 'message' is actually 100% positive, because by showing how and why almost everyone is in error about love, I can point to real love - and not only point to it but show how you can easily open it up in your own life (provided you have the clear motivation and strength of will to do so in the face of a veritable barrage of pressures to point in any other direction!).

Some of the lies about love

I say 'lies' and not simply 'erroneous beliefs', because they have ALL come to us, individually and en masse, via social conventions, religious and 'spiritual' traditions and individual channellings or intuitions, from entities in the astral sub-reality of illusion and delusion (yes - 'dark' entities!), which are interfering with us ALL, whether or not we believe in such entities or forces, and are seeking consistently and unremittingly to get people steered away from the true self realization which would open up their qualities (including real love) as manifestations of fundamental consciousness (or universal consciousness) - effectively 'the Ultimate'.

Here we go with some of the lies about love, then, which are so widely accepted.

• It's about wanting to be together with a particular person.
• It's about sexual intercourse.
• It's about desiring another person.
• It's about getting married / being married.
• It's about procreation / having babies.
• It's about Man and Woman.
• It's about living with a particular person and not wanting to be apart from them.
• It's about regarding another person as 'my own'.
• It's about another person fulfilling needs of one's own.
• It's about another person to fill a gap in one's life.
• It's about feeling that you can't live (at least a fulfilling life) without a particular person or a close relationship at all.
• It's about mutual attraction.
• It's about getting or/and giving pleasure with another person.
• It's about getting or/and giving the greatest possible thrills with another person.
• Sexual compatibility is the basis of a loving relationship.
• Love is about having a special, close relationship.
• Love is a particular feeling you have towards somebody.
• Love is a particular feeling.
• It's about relationships with people.
• True, pure (supposedly 'spiritual') love involves just one rarefied and highly 'appropriate' or 'correct' close relationship, which doesn't push anyone's religious or 'spirituality' taboo 'buttons'.
• Because true, pure (supposedly 'spiritual') love is unconditional, it involves no close relationships at all.
• As well as unconditional love (which only enlightened 'adepts' experience), there's such a thing as 'conditional love' or special love for a particular person.

Actually, those supposedly enlightened people who say that real love is unconditional have about three-quarters of a point, though it's all too easy to draw hopelessly incorrect and harmful conclusions from that notion.

So, love actually is...

Actually, as with the non-dual fundamental consciousness (or universal consciousness) itself, it is not very meaningful to make an issue of love at all, because love is NOT something separate which you can usefully describe or cultivate in its own right, and it is meaningless to talk of it as something special. Rather, it is an intrinsic quality of fundamental consciousness itself, and thus of every human, because every human is a manifestation - never mind how distorted - of fundamental consciousness. Real love is simply the fundamental characteristic which we all have, even if greatly obscured, of experiencing delight, joy and beauty in the life experience and in one's interactions with other people, and naturally tending to reinforce and where necessary cultivate that quality in others.

You see? Love isn't something you do at all. To use that word as a transitive verb shows a complete misunderstanding of the nature of love. You cannot love a person any more than a tree goes around treeing anybody!* Love is simply one of your most fundamental qualities - part of what you are - and it has nothing at all to do with trying to fulfil some perceived or postulated 'need', and it has nothing to do with having to come together with anyone, let alone get erotic with them. Love is a quality, an outlook, which underlies and permeates a healthy person's life experience, making it a 'thing' of joy and beauty. Simple as that! So, if you feel that you 'love', or particularly, are 'in love with', a particular person, straightaway you have an extremely useful warning sign that something other than love is going on for you - never mind how much your real love is also manifest. I'm not judging upon such "I love that person" reactions, but am simply pointing out what is really going on.

* Okay (sigh) - "Say that in a hurricane!" - you win!

Now, before anyone blows a fuse and imagines that I've now claimed that we shouldn't have close relationships, please note that that is NOT what I am saying at all. Reality knows no "should" or "shouldn't", for things are simply as they are. What I am saying is that much that we experience in life and have been conditioned to label as 'love' is actually not love at all and in most cases is distorted emotional energy that actually points us away from love and into unaware self-gratification and control and manipulation agendas, even if they seem subjectively wonderful. I would thus add that virtually ALL close human relationships throughout the planet are to some extent distorted and are not full manifestations of love, never mind how exalted, ecstatic or idyllic some of them may subjectively seem to be. That goes even for people who are apparently enlightened.

Such latter people usually have an amazing blind spot regarding close relationships of their own, never mind how wise and 'enlightened' those people may seem generally to be in the view of most people. It appears that enlightenment doesn't in itself guarantee the sort of comprehensive and consistent self scrutiny that could take enlightened people further, towards the state of full self realization. Indeed, it appears that for many people their enlightenment is taken as a cue to ease off on constructively critical self scrutiny, because there tends to be an assumption that "because I'm enlightened I'm already 'there'"*, and thus there is a big denial among such people almost universally of the ongoing interference they are still getting - at least covertly - from astral entities in order to keep them away from true self realization. Their close relationships, thus, where they occur at all, tend to be remarkably conventional in character.

* Actually typically such people do still see themselves as having a fair amount of work to do on themselves, but unfortunately that work which they embrace is almost always mostly formal meditation, which is one of the most harmful of the positive-looking things they could be doing at that stage, because meditation is ungrounding (thus opening one more to astral interference, whether overt or covert), almost invariably creates highly problematical astral realms rather than true self realization, and progressively hides major issues which still need addressing.

I want to avoid here getting drawn into people's confusions and complexities over relationships and what in their unawareness they are mislabelling as 'love', because the underlying reality is so beautifully simple - and I want to point you to that simplicity of outlook and help to show how easy it really is, being self realized and experiencing the whole of life as an expression of love.

If you seriously want to get the best out of life and of love and of relationships, then I have a few simple recommendations for you - certain of which will seem at first highly challenging. I do not mean that you should do any of the following things (because telling anyone that they should or shouldn't do something is nothing to do with love and is straightaway aligning oneself with the astral forces and their control-based agenda), but I do mean that if you do take up these recommendations you would turn your life around in the most wonderful way, bringing yourself more abundance in your life rather than the limitations and rarefaction which various 'spiritual' traditions point to.

• Drop 'love' from your vocabulary! (Yes, seriously, because continuing to use that word and to treat love as something separate - an issue in its own right - is part of the problem and bound to keep you confused and off course!)

• Embark on powerful true self realization methods such as those of Stephen and Lynda Kane, or, better, my own enhanced adaptations of their methods - see Healing and Self Realization - The Safest and Quickest Way.

• Abandon all notion of 'morality', and substitute deeply aware clear-mindedness, letting the love which is an aspect of your true nature be your guiding principle instead. Morality is simply sets of astral ('dark') sourced restrictive rules that have been passed on to us from religions and social conventions. Rules are asses because they are inflexible, rigid, and can never point to what is really the most appropriate and helpful thing for a specific person to do in a specific situation. Morality is not about love and indeed points diametrically away from it, because morality is about control and unawareness. Every moral code actually aligns you with the astral forces ('the dark side').

• Use energy testing in your everyday life so that you can 'live with positive intent' all the time - making choices which are strengthening to you and for your ultimate good, and to avoid making choices which are weakening for you. You'd need to use energy testing in a thorough and aware way in order not to go avoiding testing where you would be liable to get an initially discomforting but necessary answer. That's particularly true about relationships with other people. For example, it is not helpful to 'test' on somebody you're attracted to, and, upon a 'strengthening' response to countenancing that person, immediately to conclude that it's fine to try to set up a close or indeed erotic relationship with that person.

  You would also need to energy-test on how you could most beneficially relate with that person, and indeed whether, although that person apparently has compatibility with you, any significant involvement with that person at the present time would really improve your life. Basically you need to energy-test every single assumption or 'want' which you have relating to that person before you can start gaining a truly useful picture of what significance that person has or might have for you. On the other hand, if you get a 'weakening' test response to countenancing a person, then, provided you are being vigilant for astral interference, you can give a happy sigh of relief at having been spared possible 'grief' and turn your attentions to more rewarding people or other areas of life.

• Let go of all preconceptions - however socially acceptable or attractive-seeming - about what would be the most suitable sort of relationship(s) for you at any particular time, or indeed as to whether you really need any close relationship(s) at all. In other words, learn to let your mind be completely open on the issue, and to have this fully open-minded outlook when energy-testing concerning relationships of yours (actual or potential).

  Even the very use of the term 'relationship' tends to imply a very definite limiting preconception about how you might positively interact with a person, so actually you'd help yourself by dropping that word from your vocabulary along with 'love'.

• Relating to the last item, let go of any preconceptions about gender and sexual orientation in how you relate with anyone. You cannot know without rigorous energy testing that, for example, a particular person would be unsuitable for close friendship / companionship with you, and indeed with some sort of erotic component in such a relationship, on the basis of their and your gender or sexual orientation. Maybe you just assume "I'm heterosexual so I'll keep my distance from him" - but if you carefully energy test, you might get a different picture, which would be pointing to work you need to do to let go of such preconceptions and open to what is truly for your deepest and ultimate good and is indeed more truly 'you'.

  I myself have had a fair number of potential really good friends turn away from me because they'd learnt (usually from my personal website) that I open most readily to men, and were afraid that I would expect them to get into bed with me - even in cases where they expressed such fears to me and I pointed out that that was not the way I operated, and that I certainly wouldn't want people putting such expectations on me. Such fears are very deep seated, no doubt very much reinforced by astral entity interference (in my case, because the astral forces wanted to keep me isolated). What a waste, to throw away such potentially rewarding friendships and companionships on the basis of such irrational fears and preconceptions!

• Further, keep in mind that for a truly healthily functioning self-realized person the concept of sexual orientation is simply meaningless.

• Use on a daily basis the affirmations for self realization and fundamental healing and clearance of astral influences given in The Guide to Complete Self Realization - making sure to read and understand first all the introductory notes so that you approach the affirmations with at least a reasonable degree of understanding and awareness.

• Recognise ALL unbidden erotic feelings or sexual arousals as interference that you are receiving from astral entities, which are manipulating your feelings for the purpose of creating attachment in your life and steering you away from true self realization. Those feelings will derive from emotional traumas of yours or (more often) belonging to parasitic 'lost' souls attached to you; the astral entities use all of these as weapons and instruments of control. For more about such interferences, see Astral Entities - Interference and Attacks from 'The Dark Side'.

• Understand that feelings of intense ecstasy are NOT love, and are almost universally used in attacks from astral entities for the purpose of controlling us and getting us confused and stuck into unsuitable, attached relationships. I say this not from opinion but from hard experience. Fortunately I had the clarity to see what was really going on when the entities were trying this on me with regard to various people, most of whom would each have brought me serious problems if I'd allowed myself to fall into the normal confusion of infatuation.

• If you want to have a baby, STOP! ...and think very carefully! The astral forces are all the time interfering with people, getting them to put a notional seal upon basically unsuitable relationships by having children and thus getting encumbered by family responsibilities. Also, people's preoccupation with procreation and family life is itself very much given to us from our astral interference to divert us from self realization - and also to cause the progressive wrecking of our planet through its being forced to carry far too large a human population for it to support*. At the present time you'd do your environment and thus yourself and future generations a great favour by not having that baby! (always subject to the results of rigorously and awarely applied energy testing relating to your specific situation)

  * I have strong doubts as to whether Humanity is going to come to its senses about this in time, and sadly assume that a massive cull is in the pipeline for us.
  Whether that cull will be directly self inflicted - e.g. by global-scale war - or by some environmental factor (no doubt caused or greatly exacerbated by the hugely over-large population), I have no idea, though it is looking as though the imminent diminishing of our oil supplies will lead to a collapse of our civilisations, and this collapse could well achieve such a cull.
  

  Such a massive cull and all the attendant pain and suffering would no doubt well serve the agenda of the astral forces. However, there looks to be a real possibility of Humanity's total extinction because of the scale at which we are now interfering with our planet and degrading our living environment. Indeed, as far as I can make out, it looks as though causing humans to overpopulate their planet and suffer a consequence catastrophic collapse of their civilization is an active part of the astral forces' agenda which has been repeated again and again for human-type beings in other parts of this Universe and indeed in other universes. I discuss this compelling issue in The Future of Humanity.

• With a view to releasing yourself from the urge to procreate and so add to the human race's imminently desperate situation, if you feel that you have to 'make love', open yourself to same-gender lovemaking, especially where it could be or become erotic. As long as man and woman keep 'doing it' together, no amount of contraception (much of which is harmful anyway) is going to stop far too many babies being born. Mass sterilization, although a theoretical option, would be immensely harmful and would almost certainly be yet another control agenda sourced from the astral forces to screw us up still further.

• Let go of any notion that eroticism needs to be part of the closest or indeed any relationship that would benefit you. Instead of letting any social convention or your (astral-entities-sourced) feelings of craving for 'that' be your controller, let your own rigorously and awarely applied energy testing point to your own real way forward.

You will note in the above list that I am not saying you should or shouldn't do particular things (reality knows no "should" or "shouldn't"), nor that any particular choice is good or bad (nothing is intrinsically good or bad), but am simply pointing to the tremendous benefit of using energy testing and carefully chosen true self realization methods so that you can rapidly cultivate and gain your own clarity, free from the confusions of all the people around you. Like that your whole life experience can rapidly become a manifestation of real love, and immensely happier and more abundant than any life which is centred around the notion of 'having a relationship', with all the confusions and limitations which that implies.

The one relationship we all need...

Marriage, of course! -- No, only joking!

If you want to be ruled and controlled by unawareness and astral ('dark') force agenda (largely though not completely via social or religious convention) in how you relate with people, and want to be sidetracked by your interfering astral entities from self realization, then marriage is a great way to go! The whole concept of marriage is not about real love but about unawareness, attachment, control and restriction, and about turning away completely from the one relationship which every single person does need - which is a relationship unimaginably closer and more aware than any marriage or supposed soul mate relationship can bring you.

-- Well, have you got it yet? Is this crazy man about to tell us that we need to devote our lives to God or Jesus or Allah or Jehovah - or some other apparently external deity or 'ultimate'?

-- Sighs of relief (or outcries of righteous indignation)! No, I'm not that crazy. Maybe you didn't realize this (most people don't), but those just mentioned non-physical characters all have one glaring common factor - they are inventions or simulations given to Humanity by the astral ('dark') forces for the purpose of luring them away from the one relationship they really do need (at least for healthy functioning). And that relationship is...

...With oneself! That is what you open up through a proper self realization process. That relationship is also with fundamental consciousness, which is 'the ultimate' as far as anyone outside religious or mystical belief systems can determine. Through self realization you open out in yourself a previously unimagined pervasive stable and vibrant happiness and an ongoing delight in living and interacting (always positively and constructively) with other people. Then your sense of needing this or that close relationship with other people falls away, because that sense of need had been really the result of your being to a fair degree closed to yourself!

Who, then, is your 'twin flame' if anyone is? -- It is none other than yourself!

The New Age movement has been the disseminator of an astral ('dark') sourced myth about the 'twin flame' - supposedly a person who everyone due for 'ascension' (itself mythical) is destined to come together with at some point in their supposed evolution, and with whom there would be an unimaginably deep and close loving relationship - more so than any 'common or garden' soul mate relationship. What the astral forces have been doing there in disseminating that myth in the New Age movement is just the same as religions have been doing in setting up supposedly external representations of 'the Ultimate', such as God. The aim in all these cases is to lure people away from self realization and opening to their own ultimate relationship, which is already right there but just needs to be uncovered and opened out. You have no 'twin flame' but yourself.

For more about such pernicious astral influences and interferences, see Astral Entities - Interference and Attacks from 'The Dark Side'.

Does all this mean you wouldn't then have any closeness with other people as you become more self realized? -- No, that isn't at all what I'm saying, but in fact there's no Earthly point in trying to speculate in any detail as to how your personal interactions and relationships would be when you are self realized enough to have significantly opened up your own relationship with yourself (i.e. your deepest aspects), so becoming an increasingly overt manifestation of fundamental consciousness. The only thing that is clear is that attachment would be 'out' and a much greater happiness and joy in all your life would be 'in'.

Think of it this way. At the moment your life experience is shaped or coloured by a sense of lack, even though you may have been automatically regarding it as a happy life. If it were not so shaped or coloured, how is it that you (almost certainly) regard a close relationship with another person as desirable or essential for your or other people's happiness / wellbeing? Merely to hold such a belief shows that there is a fundamental lack in your life which you want to hide from by having relationships with other people. Any such relationship will thus incorporate - often unawarely - a sense of seeking to get that 'need' of a close relationship met by the other person. In fact to a certain extent (but not fully) it can be met by another person - but only because each person is, however, distorted, a manifestation of fundamental consciousness, which is also your own deepest nature.

One of the big problems about trying to use other people to make good that lack in your life is that almost universally people are not much self realized and thus they actually cannot fully make good that lack even when you are together with such people. But what about your life without such a person? If you feel you have to remain tied to that person for your happiness, then you are actually in very great trouble - never mind the fact that that is almost universally the state of people's lives.

With self realization and opening up your full relationship with yourself, you have an intrinsic happiness and joyfulness without qualification, with no sense of need for particular 'relationships' with people at all. However, you would also then be open to joyful and happy friendships / companionships with truly suitable people, not out of a sense of trying to fill a gap but, instead, of simply celebrating in the life experience*. So, instead of filling any sort of gap, your interactions with people would be bringing you further joyful happiness on top of your base state of joyful happiness and clarity.

* Yes, I well understand that some people would 'tut-tut' there and go muttering to each other things including that dirty word 'hedonism'! Labels of that sort have never served positive purposes. In any case, there is an immense difference between, on the one hand, a person who is living as an intrinsically joyful manifestation of fundamental consciousness, and on the other hand a relatively unaware and irresponsible person who is simply being driven by urges for self gratification and 'instant' pleasures, and who is thus using such devices to hide the very significant issues which he still needs to address and resolve. Such a latter person does not know true happiness, even while probably believing superficially that he has a happy life, and would not understand what I'm on about on this page until and unless he got onto a thoroughgoing self realization process and thus opened up his own awareness and intrinsic joyful happiness.

I don't know about you, but that sounds like a pretty good deal to me! All the more so because I'm actually experiencing this transition for myself, so what I'm relating here is not a matter of opinion but instead is a matter of observation from a viewpoint of fundamental clarity (my preferred term for what most people - though not psychiatric doctors! - would call enlightenment).

Also the whole fixation on the concept of 'relationships' would dissolve, because the healthy way to come together is NOT with the aim of 'setting up a relationship' but through happening to share truly life-enhancing activities. By the latter I do NOT mean the normal 'sharing of interests / activities', because, generally speaking, that is more a matter of mutual resonance in a variety of personal emotional issues which usually are more or less unacknowledged. The life-enhancing activities I'm referring to would be very much self-realization-oriented ones, but with caution they can include activities like hiking or surfing because, when well and awarely used, those can be a potent part of a person's self realization process.

On the other hand, pretty well universally activities such as gym workouts, stamp collecting, going to the theatre / cinema, watching television, going to skittles evenings, dancing and so on are used by people to bring themselves and each other to a sort of lowest common denominator of awareness. It's not that there's anything actually wrong about any of those activities - it's simply a matter of what you want in life - a sort of cosy restrictedness of outlook (and the eventual horrendous problems asscociated with that*) or the true happiness and abundance of self realization.

* In Astral Entities - Interference and Attacks from 'The Dark Side' you can read about what appears to be really happening to people who are withdrawing into restrictedness and unawareness like that - and it doesn't make comfortable reading!

Tantric lovemaking and the dubious place of ecstasy in love

The term 'lovemaking' is universally inappropriate and incorrect. I'm not saying that love isn't involved - it's just that using the term 'lovemaking' reinforces the old confusions which identify almost anything other than actual love as love. In fact love is not something you can 'make' at all! Like a nose, it just is!

Tantric lovemaking is supposed to be a really advanced and 'spiritual' way to 'make love' - which latter, as I say, needs a different term because it is emphatically not making love, even though it can be highly enjoyable or indeed ecstatic. However, "all that glisters is not gold"... Indeed, with all the hard experience that I've gained of the ways in which the astral ('dark') forces interfere with people, the very notion that a particular practice or modus operandi is 'spiritual' nowadays sets a little alarm signal flashing in me*. And, sure enough, the BIG problem here is the matter of getting fixated on experiencing ecstasy.

* For an explanation please see Exit 'Spirituality' - Enter 'Clear-Mindedness'.

Is your interest in experiencing love, or is it in experiencing ecstasy? When you seek ecstasy you are not very much in 'love' mode at all but in self gratification mode! And if you understood the true cause of any ecstasies that you have experienced, you'd most likely be horrified.

Nearly all, if not all, of the intense ecstasy experiences that anyone not in an advanced state of self realization (well beyond enlightenment) experiences - whether erotic, spiritual, aesthetic or any other sort of intense ecstasy - are actually experiences of a particular type of attack from astral ('dark') entities. The entities do it to manipulate and control everyone and, again, by cultivating the particular attachment, steering people away from self realization.

I myself have repeatedly witnessed this going on for me. In my case it became glaringly obvious what was going on, because the astral entities had a major plan of seeking to disrupt my life and wreck me or take me over as a puppet of theirs. Most other people, for whom the interference is at least mostly covert, would have no obvious cause to subject to scrutiny their ecstasy experiences and all their sexual arousals and erotic feelings or see them as anything other than 'natural, biological responses' to particular people. Nonetheless things are as they are, regardless of what people believe or disbelieve.

If you believe that you get the most sublime 'spiritual' ecstasy in your Tantric 'lovemaking', you might like to ponder the following. As far as I can tell at the moment, the real cause of your ecstasy experiences would have been just the same as what gave me ecstatic or 'attempted ecstatic' experiences in the following situations:

• Posing as a supposed ascended master, astral ('dark') entities gave me a convoluted fictional story, complete with waves of alarmingly intense sexual arousal / ecstasy feelings, in order to get me to gatecrash on and intrusively seek to get into bed with a particular charismatic man who I'd been introduced to only once - and even to rape him. (I didn't get to bed with him, and fully rebelled when my instructions reached the 'rape' point!)

• Using intense sexual arousals and misinformation coming to me through my purported higher consciousness (actually just astral entities pretending to be a higher source), the astral entities were trying hard to get me infatuated and entangled with a particular young homeless man who was scruffy and dirty and in general poor condition (heroin, smoking, drinking and most likely other drugs too). What was special about him was that he actually had an energy configuration which, despite all his problems, was remarkably similar to my own, so that even without interference I would have experienced a very strong and beautiful resonance with him. I was given a story (completely untrue) about his having been a lover of mine in certain previous lifetimes and how he and I were meant to be lovers at this time, and I was given the story that my intense sexual arousals and ecstasies over him were caused by him unawarely sending an 'energy body' to make love with me, for, allegedly, under the surface he was deeply in love with me...
  The alleged energy body from him was not entirely fictional, as I now understand, but its effects were blown up out of all proportion by attacks from the entities which were 'piggybacking' on the genuine and much more subtle positive interaction which was occurring between my own energy system and his.
  (Thankfully, I saw clearly all along that he would cause major problems if I involved myself with him at all, so I never sought to get involved with him.)

• Similarly, the entities regularly attacked me with strong sexual feelings towards various other homeless young men who had serious alcohol and other drug problems.
  (As with the above example, I recognized that such people were unsuitable and so didn't get involved.)

•  In August 2006 the entities went through a phase of attacking me strongly with impressions of Satanistic and black magic practices, together with very strong sexual arousals / ecstasy feelings, even including on one occasion a certain smell and warmth at my nostrils which was part of bringing into my awareness a trauma of one of the parasitic lost souls attached to me, in which the particular person had been forced to bury his head in the entrails of a freshly killed man during a black magic initiation ritual - and I was being given all this while being attacked with strong sexual arousal / ecstasy feelings.
  (All that felt so nightmarish despite the ecstasy feelings, that it didn't tempt me in the slightest to get into such practices!)

• The entities, posing as my 'guidance', got me 'enhancing' my solitary 'lovemaking' sessions in bed in particular ways that were maximally ungrounding - and, in particular, gave me a particular visualization practice to use at climax, which was actually extremely dangerous in its ungrounding potential (for that reason I don't describe it here) and theoretically could have given the astral forces their opportunity to stage upon me a partial walk-in (which latter is of course why they gave it to me). I did actually use it a few times, and was saved from disaster only by my having part of my awareness exceptionally well grounded for a person who is an incarnation of a new soul.

Now I want to draw your attention particularly to the last point above. In fact the whole concept of Tantric 'lovemaking', as normally understood, is actually harmful and potentially dangerous, because it is very much about getting ungrounded. Yes, you may experience great ecstasy, but, as I say, much of that will almost certainly be entity attack for the purpose of cultivating your attachment and also to continue ungrounding your awareness, so that you become more vulnerable to the astral entities and maybe would become ungrounded enough for them to stage a partial walk-in upon you (if indeed they have an interest in doing that to you).

On the face of it I don't know what people get up to in Tantric 'lovemaking' sessions, except in the very broadest terms, but, according to my energy testing, the abovementioned extremely dangerous visualization practice which the astral entities gave me was one which some people actually use in their Tantric 'lovemaking' sessions.

So, basically, ALL Tantric 'lovemaking' is best regarded as 'of the dark side' and carefully avoided. That doesn't mean that we need to avoid having wonderful experiences being physically together, however. The safe and healthy way to go about things is to maintain a balance between the connecting-up of ones' awareness and energies on the one hand and the maintaining of a clear and conscious connection with all the physical aspects of the whole experience (including one's surroundings) too. Then 'lovemaking' begins to have true self realization potential instead of merely being yet another instrument of the astral forces to take still more control over you.

Having said all the above, however, I have no need nor cause to pronounce upon what place, if any, ecstasy needs to have in our lives (apart from the clear need for lack of attachment to it) - because if people use energy testing on each situation they can find out for themselves whether and to what extent opening to ecstasy is or would be helpful for them. That is the real way forward - not hanging onto ecstasy (whether it be erotic or relating to anything else) as an attachment, nor avoiding it or discarding it when it happens, but simply energy testing on yourself at relevant times to ensure that your choices are all for your deepest and ultimate good. I'm not (yet) aware of any valid rule (bearing in mind that all rules sourced from 'the dark side' are invalid) which says that ecstasy without attachment, and in a well grounding context, is harmful for us.

Companionship still has a function...

For people who are advanced in their self realization and have little or no attachment, the conventional notion of close relationships and especially partnership is inappropriate and irrelevant, because it is based on attachment and exclusiveness, which actually result in shutting people off from joyful and loving interactions with many people. It might, then, be tempting to reactively assume that people advanced in their self realization would lead unappealingly solitary lives and not have any real closeness.

That is not the actual situation - though most people, because of their attachments and fears of being alone, are addicted to depriving themselves of a healthy degree of solitude, and so when they become more advanced in their self realization process they would joyfully embrace the freedom of having more solitude - but not to the extent of shutting themselves away for long periods meditating as so many people so misguidedly do, especially in various Eastern religions. A truly healthy life, then, embraces a good balance of companionship (of varying degrees of closeness) and 'flexible' solitude.

That companionship and closeness is NOT a need in the sense that nearly everybody believes (i.e. protecting ourselves from a harmful loneliness), but rather, it serves a very helpful function in grounding our awareness, and thus both assisting our self realization process and making us less vulnerable to interferences and influences from the astral ('dark') forces.

The power of simple friendly interactions with people to ground one's awareness was forcefully brought home to me during crises brought on by attacks from astral entities in 2004-2007. I live on my own and (at the time of writing this, in January 2008) still have no close friends to turn to in the event of such events - and so I had no alternative to contacting the local Crisis Resolution Team and on a total of four occasions even getting hospitalized. In fact just the friendly chats with the Crisis Team people or hospital nurses was all that was required to reground my awareness and get me out of those crises. Now, if I'd had healthy ongoing companionship with a reasonably compatible person or people during that time, most likely those crises could never have happened in the first place.

So, where, then, do I personally stand with regard to the points made above?

On the face of it my life experience so far has been one of isolation and lack of close relationships. In my earlier years I did have the odd friends with whom there was a fair amount of sharing of interests, but there was a massive 'awareness gap' between them and me, and also they all had control agendas which they were trying to impose upon me to stifle my own clarity, and each one, when eventually challenged, cut off from me - usually with some sort of abusive message, which helped underline my understanding that they'd really not been suitable as friends / companions for me in the first place.

I was constantly longing for an 'ideal' close relationship, but learnt through life experience that that was something pointless to search for, for that would make my life an absolute misery. Instead I assumed that if it were really meant to happen for me like that, it would happen in its own time as my own process of clearance of emotional issues continued. This outlook was much underlined by the 'insights' which I gained from Re-Evaluation Counselling, and again when I got into spiritual healing. As I now understand, those insights contained many distortions because of the astral ('dark') force involvement in our healing traditions almost universally. I was then really 'sold' on the notion of soon meeting up with my destined 'soul mate' - something which had come to me too from certain mediums who gave me readings. Little did those mediums understand that ALL channelling and clairvoyance comes from the astral forces ('the dark side') and thus contains very problematical agenda.

When I myself got channelling in 2003, the astral forces (posing as higher sources) presented to me a convoluted story in which I supposedly had been the historical king Gilgamesh and was destined in this lifetime to reunite with the soul who had been Enkidu in that lifetime - and the astral entities very strongly manipulated my feelings to make it seem as though that was true, and to try to get me really hooked on the notion of having intensely attached male lovers. Fortunately I already had the clarity not to be more than superficially and briefly taken in by that, for non-attachment is for me not something I believe in but an actuality of how I am and indeed have been since I gained fundamental clarity (crossed the enlightenment threshold) in 1997.

That non-attachment was very helpful too because the astral entities were making claims that I was due not only to reunite with the alleged Enkidu incarnation but also to have a number of other male lovers - and the entities were also, as already noted further above, trying to get me erotically infatuated with quite a variety of unsuitable or unavailable people - particularly homeless young men with drug problems.

Although I was progressively gaining more clarity through all those tribulations from the astral forces, my really big breakthrough came in May 2007, when I took up energy testing and the overall methodology of Stephen and Lynda Kane. This has not only been speedily weakening the interference from the entities, but has also enabled me to use energy testing to check whether it would be appropriate to get involved with a particular person, and to what extent, and when, it would be helpful for me to continue having solitary 'lovemaking' sessions in bed.

In fact, even without entity interference or involvement with a specific person, it turns out that there is, generally speaking, beneficial purpose in a man having periodic erotic or sexual activity, because without reasonably regular ejaculations a hormonal imbalance develops, which speeds enlargement of the prostate. Energy testing is great for establishing when it would be helpful to 'do it', and also to establish when and in what situations 'doing it' would actually be weakening for one. For myself at the moment, my energy testing indicates an interval of about two to three weeks between such sessions - though I use energy testing on the issue more frequently, and always use it when I get an unbidden arousal come up, so that I'm not following any sort of rule but simply working on the basis of what my own non-physical aspects indicate to be most helpful and healthy for me to do or not do at the particular time.

Because I've now supposedly cleared out the underlying cause of the pretty unremittingly solitary lifestyle and sense of isolation which have marked this life of mine, my possibilities for companionship will undoubtedly increase now. On the other hand, there are factors which make it wellnigh impossible for me to have the sort of healthy ongoing close companionship which most others would take for granted. I'm 65 now, and my energy system is still configured to relate closely only with much younger men - particularly in their 20s. This is not a matter of physical attraction but of energy makeup. My own energy makeup and outlook are very much those which one would associate with a young man, because typically people deteriorate and become set in their ways as they get older (never mind that they may gain in wisdom in certain narrow areas of their life experience). For that very reason, people who are anything close to my own age are actually unhealthy for me as company because of the energy mismatch - there being vanishingly few people at all close to my age who are incarnations of new souls (and thus with no astral programming) and are in a sufficient state of self realization that they wouldn't be a drag upon me.

Yet, if I sought to set up ongoing close companionships with such much younger men, in the vast majority of cases that would distort the life experience and self realization process of my companions - and thus overall would not really be strengthening for me despite the various benefits for me.

It was the astral ('dark') forces which set me up to be in this enforced solitary state so that I would be maximally vulnerable to their attacks and all their stories about lovers and soul mates who I was supposedly due to meet up with, and so would supposedly get nicely attached to their bait (complete with a story that I was due to be transferred into a new body - that of a 25-year-old man!) so that the astral forces could take full control over me.

Meanwhile, however, my self realization process has dissolved the old loneliness, though just at the moment the entities still attack at times with memories of it. In place of that I have an ongoing great happiness and the capacity to experience my transient encounters with particular people in my everyday life - particularly on my hiking outings - often as very beautiful and loving experiences. So I'm not at all like those individuals who have meditated much of their life experience away and who equate self realization with a 'monastic' and more or less solitary existence. For myself, I shall remain solitary only until and unless I cease to be solitary! Love, however, doesn't depend on such issues, and, as I say, like my nose, it just is.

"But this is still unnatural. Man and woman were made for procreation..."

On this page I haven't been talking about procreation but about the place and meaning of love in our lives. If you're really off the rails enough want to have a baby at the moment, go and 'make love' or copulate with someone - of the opposite gender of course! Yes, you need opposite genders for that. Simple! There is no other worthwhile significance for genders.

However, that above statement about man and woman having been made for procreation is tantamount to saying that man and woman were made to destroy planet Earth! As I've already indicated, there is a pressing need for very many of us at the present time NOT to have babies - or otherwise we are due for a massive cull or even extinction. Please see The Future of Humanity.

In any case, that statement also carries the assumption that we are just animals - a greatly unaware belief that is blown right out of the water for anyone who becomes enlightened and perceives their own true nature directly (as I do). The reality is that we are consciousness, and consciousness cannot be defined in terms of biology, gender, sexual orientation, or 'natural' / 'unnatural'.

"But even Archangel Chamuel says..."

I have seen quotes from channelled writings supposedly from 'ascended Masters' and archangels, condemning physical, same-gender expressions of love. The latest such ones I saw were from the channelled writings by Elizabeth Clare Prophet - a supposedly reputable channel, who, like ALL channels, was unawarely receiving communications from astral ('dark') entities pretending to be higher sources.

ALL channelled information in fact has come from, or is at least adulterated by, 'the dark side'. For further, important, information please see my article Better Without Channelling, which goes into the pitfalls and limitations of channelling in some detail and shows that ALL channellings are seriously problematical.

There is only one reliable source for information as to what is truly appropriate for you in terms of your relationships - and that is your own deepest aspects, which are what you tune into through energy testing.